Stickin it in the Wrong Slot

We all get a little 'randy' when we have a few drinks in us, but this guy really wanted that special someone with whom to make a deposit.

Problem is he was trying to stick it in the wrong slot.

This guy walked into a bar & grill, dropped his pants and proceed to have sex with the ATM.

Yup.  Gave it the long poke.  But he didn't stop there.  Cops, unable to quell his raging beast, dragged him outside and sat him down on a picnic table...
which he also violated.  Guess jesus might have had something with that whole "love of money = evil" thing.

Click on his handsome mug for the full rundown.

Avengers: Age of Ultron Plot Details! (Possible Spoilers)

Ok, so while i'm on this gigantic nerd
spree, I might as well jump into some Avengers talk.

The first movie blew my mind.
and my wad.

But this second one is shaping up to be even more explosive.
(yes, pun intended)

Rumor is some plot details have been leaked and I'm here to spread the love.
If you don't care about possible spoilers, go touch Ultron wherever you like and learn all his dirty secrets.

The Ultimate Prophylactic

While condoms are 98% effective in preventing pregnancy, I've found that talking about Dragon Ball Z is 100% effective in preventing sex.

Take that Trojan Man

Wrinkly Kitty

It has been crowned.
Poppy the cat has been recognized by
Guinness World Records as the oldest cat alive.

Now how old exactly is this cat?

In cat years, old enough to enjoy a brew with Clint Eastwood while screaming at multicolored strays to stay off the lawn.

In human years, that's 24.  However that doesn't even hold a candle to the oldest cat ever recorded.

 Put a hand on Selina Kyle's wrinkled features (if you dare) to find out what I'm talkin 'bout.

24 Hours of Power!

It's gonna be a Media EXPLOOOOSION!!

I'm going balls out (dong in) for the next 24 hours and bringing more entertaining media and stories than you can shake a 33 and a half foot pole at.

Yes, maybe you could go elsewhere to look for your funny, entertaining media content, but why bother?

I got it all right here baby!

So keep hitting that refresh button.  Complimentary happy endings offered.

When Star Wars just isn't nerdy enough...

You mix it with Nintendo and what you get is just..  Sploosh

Bringing an extra large fork to breakfast

So this dude in Georgia walked into a Waffle House -  and like a gentleman he brought his own utensil.

A pitchfork.
Only he wasn't there for breakfast.  Nah, he was staging his own ghetto reenactment of the intro to Pulp Fiction.

How successful was he without a preachy Samuel L. Jackson to interfere?  Follow the link to find out.